Had a dream just now scare me to death!!! I dreamt of my mum buy very fanciful bra for so ugly like for those belly dancer de wa I woke up straight away siao sia
today no sch happy
i dreamt about you and me10:32 AM.
Wednesday, April 28, 2010
ThatDay at mrt saw two woman snatching for seats kind of shock cause that was the first time I saw it hmm quite interesting haha if I'm able to stomp it will be good haha....
Hmm today submit the tp care fund hopefully I can get the 1k hmm what should I do with it??? Buy laptop???? Or safe it??? Lappy lappy very poor now sianx I going to get a job soon definately if not I will become mi Chong hai....
Sch nothing special it's funny to Noe azhar play pokemon haha I Aldo play last time remember whn I was sec 4 I still watch pokemon haha hmm must watch finish then can go out if not diedie also dun wan haha....
Meiling didn't come today hai.... If she persist she is going to debar list I somehow pity her I have been thinking will anyone accept her even she change sometimes I don't think she deserve all this but sometimes it is so hard to bear with it ppl who r new may not even like her they just saw her like 5 times till now ba but ppl just can't help to dislike her!!! Y??
Feel like helping her I Noe how hurtful to Noe someone hate u dislike u ignoring u leaving u all alone when u need help nobody but to depend on urself but seriously given ur attitude toward others ppl might not even want to help u... I'm not saying I'm good ppl might just find me irritating annoying but I dunno y ppl still talk to me maybe they r kind... Thanks everyone...
Now I Noe ur situation I wish for ur best I only noe a little...
Was keep thinking of calling lao gong han jia hong Jin Jun yi Johnny went hong n went sum to sing k haha in my imagination it will be fun ba haha yippee. I'm so gonna plan it hee
thinking of graduation night will ite student have that haha see every guys in tuxedo girls in dress OMG wonder how it's like haha...
Was searching for the scent
thought it was just a dream
walking in the street
I think I smell it
I search for it
but it was nowhere to be seen
I was waiting for it
for the one and only.
If there was a chance to have a retry
what will u choose?
The only chance for u to try
will u waste it on the past?
What if u knew all this will happen?
Would u give it a try??
if it is just a dream
would u wish it to be real?
i dreamt about you and me7:45 PM.
Today is fun I love it the feeling feel like it's been so long that we enjoy that much!!! Went to watch shutter island today this show is damn nice I got no words to actually describe it but a simple nice,.,. It's rather confusing due to the ending given as I do not know whether he is the mad person or a person who is brainwashed!!! It's exciting I guess it's even better than orphan I must say!!! Thumbs up...
We didn't eat dinner today cause ah Ma bought lots of food in the afternoon which is like 2 packet of rice but to me at that time it's a lot!!! Put few songs in my phone hmm... Cause I got bored of my old songs!!
Suddenly remembered I was in the train to meet lao gong on Friday on the way I met some idiolts that made me angry n some that actually freak me out reach a station there is this uncle who look like 50 plus there is already a way open for him to get out at that station but he so stubborn insist of getting out at my side instead of tapping my shoulder he tap my waist it was so wrong he should know that it's wrong damn fucking angry la.... Then come a freak... He come in straight grab the 3 pole that is in the middle n he rest his face on my hand then I pull it off he look at me like he is going to attack me with his hands but the problem is his facial expression don't look like he look more like he has something wrong with his brain!!! So I step back his bag damn big but he is swinging around with it!! Then I got no choice but to move back n not grabbing onto the pole somehow I lost my balance so I grab back I feel his fingers delibrately touching mine so I was damned pissed off I decide not to grab it again.... Damn unlucky he next stop getting off but he wait until everyone get off I was like keep moving back la... Coz he take up the space!!!! Fuck...!!!
I think is tue or Thursday I can't remember it was an unlucky day too.... Found a fly inside my mee soto n the wings is seperated from the fly I take it out continue eating then found a feather inside the soup totally no appetite decided not to eat anymore than night time went to wdl food court eat found hair inside my rice I was like WTF one day can find so many thing I was wondering why don't u all drop money in instead!!!!
i dreamt about you and me10:22 PM.
Today went to watch bounty hunter nice show love it but lao gong fell aslp lol
Saturday
hmm was in the cab just now cause yesterday I stayed over night at lao gong house hehe hmm in the cabby i was thinking of asking jia hong they all sing k dunno they want or not??? Coz I sign up a nebo membership got 20% discount n movie tickets cheaper n escape theme park 7.50 each cool right haha told lao gong our 1st year anniversary play whole day he say ok worx happy... Love u....
My phone abit siao siao Liao hai I think I better go service soon and lao gong lost the bet to me haha I win yippee
love mango sago that's the best
I wan watch shutter island and rec 2 and ip man2!!!! Hehe can't wait
down with love this show not bad.... Quite interesting but the ending hmm abit lame Nia....
Sometimes I think that Im quitE lucky I have almost everything
haha my cca had increase I joined badminton le haha happy still love tennis will be playing with lao gong more ba hope so... Actually I still can't play sports de but nvm la that's what uncle n ma say but I believe if I take care of it should be alright de
lao gong love to be jealous.... Jealous of jw but I know is because he love me I promised him not to talk to him le but he say I can so I think I will talk to him lesser!!! But I will still talk to him haha because ur jealous face is so cute!!! Hmm lao gong I know u will read so I shall say it here I will never betray u so don't u worry.... I did not betray any of the ex so I will treat u fair too I will not betray u... Coz I'm a Les ehh kidding hee
i dreamt about you and me6:21 PM.
It's been a long time since I was sitting at the hall listening to music with no one talking to me this was kind of nice hmm having pe now looking at them playing floor ball and badminton feel kind of like what should I play after hmm dunno when started to become lazy not sporty haha I think last time is better isn't it?? Haha got to slim down definately!!!!
i dreamt about you and me4:01 PM.
That day was chatting with lao gong about my character lao gong he like me this way well I was thinking what I'm like now compared to the past was wondering how much have I changed.... Actually found that I lose my way but one thing for sure I'm still me there is no possible ways to become Huili or Meiling or grace or anybody else... No point looking back now I may change back but will anyone accept the changes that cailing tried to made??? I believe my mum don't care!!!! Talk to lao gong about this was Hoping to find back some memories how I'm like maybe there is a chance to turn back but end up like no help....
was grateful Huili chat with me during the day at lt1... To be frankly speaking i was going to sit with Jian wen But she actually help me kind hearted girl... Hao xin you Hao bao....
Love this song "I will always love u". Nice!!!!
i dreamt about you and me11:41 PM.
Haha today happy went to wm to eat mac with lao gong double cheeseburger still the best hee... Went to watch date night that movie damn nice very funny 5 star!!! Just now heard wei wei cry but go see he still sleeping dunno I got hear wrongly Ma....
Haha I think my ear got problems haha eye then ear haha....
My crash comic cannot find hai dunno where I put Liao
Yippee I found my ez link card wahaha happy hmm damn lucky la....
Saw my friend in fb say nothing gonna be the same but it's a good thing that I moved on...
Hmm quite true nothing going to be same always de moving on is just part of the life we were force to move on no matter how much we wish to stay even we stayed time pass nobody wait for anybody!!!
Hmm today at the train look at the old ppl wanted to give up seats de but An auntie give Liao.... some ppl say de quite true we pay the same amount as the others but y only the kind ppl give up seats and stand throughout the whole journey whereas others choose to be selfish n keep the seats to themselves???? But all these depend on ownself!!! No one to be blame or say right or wrong... In fact those old ppl have to fight for themselves if u dun fight for urself who will??? When u do things u don't let other gain too so it's the same when ppl do thing they naturally don't let u gain... U wan that thing then fight for it u wan that thing work for it not borrowing money after that still need return right!!!
i dreamt about you and me11:17 PM.
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
Pls remind me how I'm like last time i've lost myself until I couldn't recognize!!! Till now then I realise
i dreamt about you and me11:08 PM.
Was reading her blog saw her friends comment found out that my comment sucks maybe she don't really need it sorry for the lousy comment ....
Not saying u all must give in to me la of course I still want to be fair la but seriously u all dun wan at first de lo y come fight when I explain siao I shouldn't have told u in the first place somemore there is no fucking way that I wan to be on tue all Malay dunno anything ask who if we absent who help us???
Just now at class was deciding to have my lessons on tue or Thursday I choosed thur la then tue can go off early but only 9 person are allowed to attend on thur now struggling Mei group my group weng hong group just now lao gong said I talk too much hmm indeed I really talk too much think I shouldn't have give any comment n just give in hai.... Dumbass but my heart don't feel like giving in so I just keep talking lol I must be crazy I think I shouldn't do this anymore should not show any of my unsighted sights anymore...
But then everyday so late I naturally wish to go home early hai.... Hope I can get it when I say I wan means I sure win I was jk how can so easy de if can I god Liao lo!!! But I think they will be mad ba can see grace bui song soooo..... If u say u wan do project I also can say what!!! U got I dun have meh??? WH has been kicked out of the group to another group I really dunno how to communicate with him so I choose Johnny instead at least better la.... Sorry WH too bad u r too late to know that I'm a bitch....
Hmm went to see doc he say ok Liao recovering fast but operation still at risk so if the gel is ripping my nerves I will have to operate if not should be everything alright medicine still must put
tmr can get my new spec happy.... I think the spec not bad la cox I comfortable but I think kind of ugly ba but who cares comfort is more important if u force urself wear something that doesn't fit u in the first place in the end suffer is u....
i dreamt about you and me9:15 PM.
Cut myself today n it bleeds kind of pain but it seems like I do not have any feelings....
i dreamt about you and me1:45 AM.
Damn suai la I lose my ez link card fuck sia how unlucky can I be today was kind of sad coz I've been doing lots of housework recently so tiring n da yi Ma come also even worse n now ez link card lost hai was searching whole day ask them all dunno I Noe it's my fault but still it seems that no one make an effort to help when they lost something I helped them find but when I need help it seems that I wasn't worth any help when u all need me then do all those kind of things when I need help I don't see u people around so I say treat people good it's like fucking no use la....
Recently been thinking my house is not like a house to me it's more like a lodge a place to stay for the time being.... N I've decided not to show any more feelings n stop the rebellious actions... It's like no one care no one notice I tired they also tired for what... Ah gu say when I 21 years old he gonna open chalet for me i told him nobody would ever come last time my mum open one for me too only me n my family relatives n my mum friends why waste the money??? I m sick n tired of celebrating birthday hoping people will come but none came.... Nobody free to come only me thinking of how to celebrate for others but none ever surprise me.... I quit being a clown spending money n time for the best of u all hoping someone would be happy for what I've done for them but it's more torturing when the day come nobody care to give a surprise maybe I'm too demanding.... As humans are greedy they always want more good is never enough best is the new average perfect is the standard!!!
Last time I always hope that manga stories might happen in my life but afterall it was all dreams how can it be true where I'm living in the real world I told someone there is true friends in this world before but now I m not believing it I don't even want to believe in my family member anymore.... My mum always scold me say I always treat friends better than family cause friends is a new thing for me I've never tried but even I threw it away to try to put family first I'm tired too tired to even fight back.... U said that because u wan me to help u in the chores not family... I kind of regret for doing that....!! People always reject me because of their family but I always help them tag along with them if they need help I hope to be the first but then it seems like I m just a loner when I need help I dunno who to find only 1 to 2 person is there for me n I'm glad but looking at others sometimes I think is it because is my fault or is others I have no idea!!!!
i dreamt about you and me1:25 AM.
Y does people get cut unknowingly lol I got cut n I dunno haha I m like a housewif now I enjoy doing house chores but when my mum tell me to do it i just feel angry n don't feel like doing it but if I do without she telling me I really enjoy it haha
now sitting with puppy in the park haha sound so smooth hmm was thinking want to cut short hair let my hair grow again but think that need go school all this how to cut ah loux hai....
Looking at u
wanted to believe in u
but u just don't seem to bother
my feelings
all u care is ur feelings
I wish upon the stars
for u to stop talking to me
but
there is no response
no actions
nothing
sometimes it's just pisses me off
because in ur eyes
nothing is good
no better
no perfect
no best
we r lousy in ur eyes
because u think u r the best
i dreamt about you and me10:36 AM.
Sometimes I wonder what's the life of an adult!!! They look carefree some not all I wonder my child will be proud of me as I'm their mother wondering whether will be able to take care of them well last time I said I do not want to give birth but looking at babies they r so cute hoping to have 1 too but look at my brother hai... Scare to have 1 like him.... Old people say if the parents ugly the children will be damn beautiful dunno true or not.... Just now want go slp de my Ma call say cook I think I go work as maid better lo still got salary eyes like that also cannot go work but gd thing is can rest at home but I thinking whether I got rest or more tired hai....
Just now went to look at Huili blog hai thinking of the past haha so fun... But I believe when friends quarrel that is to know each other better friends that doesn't quarrel is weird unless they really r similar.... But there r people say when friends quarrel there r no turning back I wonder is it true haha whatever it is hope that one day we will be back like last time.... Dunno can Ma cause I became like a bitch already... Maybe I should hang out with bitch ha jkjk
Monday is a unlucky day first school reopen n I can't see second I have to go checkup on that day which is like first day jiu skip class sian
tmr lao gong come n stay at my house Monday go school together hee happy!!!!!
Ahhhhhh my souppppppp.....
Btw I learn how to cook
i dreamt about you and me5:14 PM.
Doc says there is gel substances in my right eyes will have to remove if it's still there hmm there will be an operation on my eyes cool hmm I wonder how will it feel
bet with my lao gong that Ma will surely call me do housework, take care my bro, teach my sisters, sure will ask me do something we bet 10 dollars haha yipee sure win!!!! Hmm today morning 7plus they wake me up coz wei wei want my phone then I give him lo lol u all say don't always give in to him then when I don't u all say give in la.... Always BEng wei.... There is always a limit to everything!! for what u have done now I believe Xinyi n ah Mei limits is there n they will burst anytime ESP ah Mei I will just sit here n have a nice show even they don't do it now they will when they older n what causes it it's u all u all too dote wei wei Liao!!!
one day u all will regret.... Then phone low batt so he come in want to charge by himself he don't even know how to plug in I want help him then he don't give I tell u la I believe as a mother u will have the authority to stop him instead u scold me say who call u put the phone where he can reach n see this is my room why I can't put anywhere I want??? Then I ignore u go back to slp u keep coming in la tell me this n that.... Say I must hide it.... I wonder m I a thief or what charge phone must hide the phone hide the charger u think ur son retard??? Dunno meh he know how to play sure know how to find la.... U show it to him first not me... Is ur fault that he is finding the phone everyday n I have to endure it....
Then ur last word at 8.15 before u leave the house help me defroze the chicken wash the mushrooms.... U wake up Liao I haven't la.... do I look like a maid to u??? ..... Maria........ Fcuk....
U say he still young dunno this n that when I was his age I lied u cane me punish me when I eat slowly u pull me to the toilet n eat y aren't u all treating them the same y is it always only me.... Fcuking unfair.... U all wear the fcuking contact lens nothing happen I wear fcuking got gel got this got that..... I know I m a bitch but do I even deserve it....
U neglect our feelings for his smile
When u tell me to talk to u in my mind I was thinking u r lying u r not even trustworthy I was suspecting was thinking do u even want to listen what cailing got to say???? Have u even listened once..... U don't even know when I'm crying when I'm sad when I'm happy by peeping my fcuking diary doesn't help I know u peep ever since that day I don't write I did not angry at u for peeping where as u blame me for putting in the drawer where u can see...
U said u wanna listen
u said u wanna know
u said u wanna understand
u said u wanna us to be gd
u said u wanna us to be happy
but for what u done
u ignore our feelings
u ignore our sadness
u ignore what we wanna say
but in the end u always say tell me
where u dun even listen
where u dun even keep promises
where u dun even help
u say all this because u r a mother
u r doing what a mother should do
but u r not doing it wholeheartedly
because u never listen....
i dreamt about you and me8:21 AM.
